My New Life

...........in Mistissini

It has its surprises from time to time.

I find that more and more I am getting to like it again...living in a Cree community. Living in 'white' community has always been a huge blessing and now the shock of not having a white friend is over, I can live here another few months here with my Indian peeps in the true white or green north. Actually, it's not that I don't have white friends, but missing the great friendships that I had for 2 years. it took a few weeks to adjust and know that I will not have the life I had back in TO with all the wonderful great things that were fun and accessible and the friends of course . The transition is over and now I am getting to love the feeling of settling in and having somewhat of a routine, who knows maybe I'll move south or to the west coast once I am done my time here.

I am a full time worker now and I have been very blessed with that. I love where I work. I know I will probably face some challenges, but it is ok and even better for me in the future. There is a promise for me that says "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength", so I should be doing good as I have many helpers here on earth as well from heaven. Although 9 - 5 was not my deal or kind of living, at the present moment...I am not minding it at all.

I've also been teaching some life changing teachings to women this week and to see my papa show up feels very exciting knowing he is doing the work. And all I have to do is speak out his truth. I will be doing another 2 sessions with them again next week, so that will be fun and I look forward to what more papa will do for us all. I love it when we give him time and day to let him move in us, in our hearts because He does change our hearts in the end when we have said yes to him.

Two things I learned during my time here since I been home and it hasn't been a month yet. One, take time to process and accept the (difficult) time of transition and two, take the initiative -do something. I was sad the first couple weeks to be honest, but I had the choice to stay in it for a few more weeks or month?? I was actually bored as well because I made my life boring here. I didn't do anything to make things change.

So one Sunday I went to church and I felt it during the week....that I ...needed to do something. Because all along I was basically living for me, myself & I!! So in one announcement at the Baptist church, they needed volunteers for the awana nite for kids and so I was excited for that because I can do something on a Tuesday than just do my own thing at home. I can have a routine...wow..listen to me now...I want a routine, but not the kind that sticks for a long rigid time.... Flexiblility is still my way of moving, but I want to be out there and involved in my community in the small things because that is probably where there I may influence someone in a possitive way. wow....another change...hmmm... I was used to be afraid of influencing people around me thinking I had such a bad streak, but I don't. hmmm..how cool is that? anyway....

I felt a change one afternoon, a sudden one and I think it was because I was embracing change and wanted to do something other than what I did at home. That's when things began to roll. Now I must rock on out!!!

I am indeed blessed!

Blessed where ever I am and wherever I go. I must be so loved...Indeed I am!!!

home alone

wow....kinda feels nice to be home alone...having so much space. what do I do with all these space. I love it though. I can do what I want and be 'me' as well.

Kinda weird to say that, but I know I have not been really me....a lil afraid that no one will understand me..the new me....in a way i want to be the one I was known for..just so it is more familiar and easy to get along with..But that isn't right.
I guess I have to take a risk and see how things will go and turn out..... Maybe in the meantime, I can practice it...

How I miss being with friends and be crazy. I can't really do that as I don't have a lot in common with most people. My friends have their own world. So how do I begin to engage? feels a bit more tougher with my kinda peeps than it is with white folks. I miss them dearly beloved white folks of mine. all my love to thee. xo

long weekend

So, what can you do up in the freezing north? ok, maybe I am exagerating, but you have to understand that I was in California where it never was chily. I still miss California..the people, the place, basically just about everything. It's my sister in laws birthday nite and having a glass of wine and the rest of the gang was playing poker...they tried to teach me, but i couldn't be bothered to learn. I just don't get and it's just one too many numbers. My younger brother is here for the weekend and it's been a ball since he's been here.
We have no plans for this weekend, but as far as I know we are staying put. I was hoping to leave, but I am still in the process of paying bills.
Hmmmm...life is interesting here. I've worked 2 weeks now and i have one more week to go and I will probably work another 2 weeks.
Anyway, I;m kinda boring right now, just now because I have not done anything different in my life. I need to be more creative and take the initiative...when it comes to doing stuff.
I guess I could or should work on my many sermons that are going on in my mind!! Anyway "I gots to go, cause I got nothing against them Indians".